Procrastination....whats that?

When you look in the dictionary under the word procrastination you will see a picture of me... no actually you will find this....

to put off intentionally and habitually
OR
to put off intentionally the doing of something that should be done

So I've been like this all my life...I'm the person you see writing the paper the day b/f its do or to start studying for a test that day....so its in my nature and I've only come to realize how completely bad it has become. As most of you know my work week went from working 5 days a week to only working 3 - 12hr shifts. Now I will be the first to say that I love, love, LOVE having 4 days off in a row every week I mean who wouldn't But my procrastination has become at its absolute worse....I put EVERYTHING off until my last day off. And everything includes...doing dishes, laundry, house cleaning....you get the picture. So now it is Wed night and I go back to work tomorrow and I have only done 2 loads of laundry this weekend and just barley maintained the appearance of the house and I hate starting my work week w/ a dirty house. But I look back at my days off and realized I have done jack shit this weekend!!! It's become so annoying but I still keep doing it always promising that I will do better tomorrow or next week or whenever I feel like getting around to it.

Is there an afterlife?

Hello fellow readers today I am going to discuss the topic of death. I know something that seems a little out of the ordinary but for me not so much. You see for some reason I find it so interesting... the way we just cease to exist and we have no idea what really happens after the fact.

I personally am not a highly religious person, don't get me wrong I do believe in God or at least a higher being other than myself. When I was little I would picture that you were greeted at a big gate w/ St.Peter (I think he's the one) checking your name off the list as you pass by as he stands at a wooden podium w/ a floor that consist of cloud like materiel. Other times I was even be too afraid to think about it b/c it just seemed the lights are out and then what...do you know? or have any ideas?

I was exposed to death at a young age. My three grandparents had all passed away before I was in the 2nd grade. My most memorable experience was with my grandmother in Cleveland (my mom's mom) My mother and I were up there for at least the last month or so of her life, while my dad and his sisters where here in Oklahoma as their mother passed away. Both passed w/i a month from each other. I recall having to walk to the bus station to go visit her in the hospital. I remember her coming home to my aunt's house and waking up to her vomiting blood. They then had me go for walk with my cousin Dave while the paramedics took her back to the hospital where she later passed on. I don't really remember her funeral as much as I remember her wake. I remember wearing a pink dress and seeing her in the casket and my mom and her sister saying that they were waiting for her to just wake up. I don't recall being scared or nervous or anything at all. It just was what it was.

Now working at the emergency room I again deal w/ death on regular bases. The first time I walked into a room where the patient had passed away I almost expected some sort spiritual feeling or maybe a presence of something. But there was nothing .... just nothingness. I don't think its like the movies... I don't think you hover above and watch the Dr's work on you. I think your just gone. I think and know most are gone before they even hit our door. I do believe that you have a spirit or soul that leaves your body but where it goes after that I don't know. I don't think that you necessarily go to "heaven" I think that you just go to a different plane of existence. But I do think your spirit/soul/presence can visit those that are still in the here and now. There are times that I have felt my grandmother Bradford (dad's mom) around me.

The story of her presence that stands out the most to me is about two years ago I was sleeping and my dog Casey had a bad seizure (he is epileptic). He was about 10yrs old at the time I was home alone and this was the worse one that I had seen him have in a really long time. I truly thought he was going to die that night. I had him in bed w/ me and he seemed to have a hard time breathing and I was crying -- if he was going to die I just wanted it over with you know -- I cried out to my grandma asking for help and I swear to you right after I did that Casey's breathing went normal and he turned and licked my nose like nothing was wrong. I honestly believe she was there!!

So what are your thoughts on the subject?? Do you think there is a such thing as heaven or do you believe in ghost or spirits? If so I would love to hear your stories!

Currently craving chocolate and watching Trauma: Life in the ER

What is wrong with people...

*names have been changed to protect identity*

So I'm sitting at the front desk at work and this guy walks in and he has been stabbed in the abdomen. So we rush him straight back to a room and I go back there to register him and ask him for a social/b.day and name. Patient give it to me I check him in by ss# the last name and b.day match different first name --- no biggie people go by different names all the time --- so go back in and we ask patient -- his name and he responds with *Ronnie but we have *Robbie (seriously this is how close the names are even though this is not his real name) We ask his b.day again and that checks out and we ask for ss# again and he gives everything the same but the last four are different...wtf! Patient has a freaking twin brother named *Robbie and gave me his ss# when I first asked him for it....um okay. So Dr. have already put in orders for surgery and loads of blood from the blood bank and all kinds of other shit on the existing account # for *Robbie and now this isn't *Robbie. Patient has NO ID on him what.so.ever so how do we know who he REALLY is. His son who is like 15 or 16 now checks in so one of the police officers goes in to ask what his dad's name his and according to them the kid stumbles and says *Robbie no *Ronnie and from there on out says his dad's name is *Ronnie....again wtf. THEN another police officer says that someone at dispatch looked up their driver's license and the only difference b/w the two is one has blue eyes and one has green eyes. SO.... an officer goes in and looks at his eyes and asks the patient what color are your eyes and his response is "green" --- Well *Robbie has green and *Ronnie has blue ---- *Robbie is the name we originally had!!!! The officer truly believes that this is *Ronnie not *Robbie but how do we REALLY know!!!! Seriously!!!

Talk about a mess....I had a headache after that one!!! However the guy did have probably about a 4 to 5in stab wound with about 6 inches of fatty tissue hanging out that looked like raw hamburger meat --- pretty cool!!

Another interesting thing that came in last night is this guy walked in b/c he had a bottle of tabasco sauce stuck in his rectum.... I will give you a min to reread that sentence..... yep a bottle of tabasco sauce --- he had to go to surgery b/c the Dr was unable to remove it in the ER. I got to see the x-ray today and here the whole time I was picturing the Tabasco brand nope it was definitely the Louisiana brad - much like the bottle below....yep I thought I'd give you a picture ...and let me tell ya this was not a tiny bottle either!!

Once again.....What is wrong with people??

Doxie Dash '09

This year our baby Charlie Bean was in the 5th annual Dachshund Dash. We were so excited !!! We trained him by running in the parking lot across the street and also playing fetch in the house. The only thing is that he got really scared when they put him in the little box.

We will work on that for next year!!

Once the race began the dogs on either side of him crossed in front of him along w/ their owners and Charlie did not see Brad right away, but once he did they were off...he was not even distracted w/ the other dogs running around him!!

I was quit impressed!

Charlie came in 4th in his heat out of 8! I think thats pretty darn good especially since this was his first race and he raced against Rufus the Grand Champion from the last two yrs! We had lots'o people show up to cheer little Bean Butt on. Both my parents and Brad's mom and step dad along with his granny and then a few of our friends -- It was a pretty fun afternoon to say the least :o)

Brad, Me & Charlie Bean

showing our support....

Brad & Bean watching the first race

the introduction

and they're off....

crossing the finish line
I'm so proud...sniff, sniff *tear*

TEAM CHARLIE BEAN
Kathy,Lindy,Callie,Clint,Me,Brad
&
Charlie Bean

Blank

Ok, ok I have been totally slacking in the blog department once again all I can say is I'm sorry.

So here's whats been happening I lay in bed listening to Brad snore and fidget around and I come up w/ all these fantastic blog topics and ideas and I will actually write them out (or at least get them started) in my head and then I eventually fall asleep. Next day I will go to blog and I got nothing -- or I know what I want to blog about but can't remember how I worded everything the night b/f and I just go blank...even w/ this one -- Last night I couldn't sleep I was so freakin, stinkin tired b/c we had done some yard work and I decided today I was going to blog about how I can't remember my blogs I come up w/ and I even thought man if only I had paper b/c I know I won't remember tomorrow.....and once again I remember subject but not all the wording -- I think I may invest in a small tape recorder -- if only I could get past the sound of my own voice....

does anyone else hate the sound of their own voice or is it just me... it sounds so much deeper in my head.

Anyways yesterday I got totally hooked on Tori & Dean home sweet hollywood... I know totally gay but I couldn't help it they had a marathon and I got sucked in so much that I have it set to record the new season.

anyone else out there a fan?? or am I the only one?

Reminds me I need to watch the Hills (another pointless show I'm addicted to)....think I'm going to do that now!

ttyl,
Loves

Waiting...

One- Waiting on pictures

I'm sure some of you are wondering about the doxie dash and I promise I am going to blog all about it but I am waiting for pictures to be emailed to me to make the blog complete -- don't worry as soon as I get the pics I will be sharing them with all of you.

Two- Waiting on the sun

I am so freaking tired of all this rain it just makes me so lackadaisical. I don't want to do anything at all buy sleep. This is either day 16 or 17 in a row of rain - blah!! I miss the sun!!

Three - Waiting for July

I however am extremely excited b.c we just bought our ticket to fly out to Colorado to visit Brad's dad in July. So far are plans include - Journey & Heart concert at Red Rocks, whitewater rafting down the royal gorge (which I am pumped about), my first MLB game Rockies vs. Giants and outlet mall shopping which I can't wait and am saving my $$ for the coach outlet!!

SO FREAKIN EXCITED!!

Queen For the Day

Thanks to one of my dear friends zepolopez I have been tagged to be Queen of All Things Awe-summm!

What you do is list seven things that make you awesummm and then pass the award on to seven other people who you think are fabulously awesummm.

Seven things that I think make me Awesummm:

1. I break out in random dance moves for no reason at all -- this has been known to happen anywhere anyplace.

2. I tend to be very random and easily distracted by my own randomness.

3. I talk to myself out loud all the time - which is a sign of intelligence - therefore despite all other beliefs I am smart :0)

4. I know longer care if I do something that makes me look stupid - I'm the first one to bust out laughing at myself.

5. I am honest -- even if it hurts.

6. I would give you my last dollar if you told me you needed it - b/c thats the kind of person that I am.

7. I let people know when they are doing a good job or have helped me greatly -- everyone needs acknowledgment.


In no particular order here are the peeps that I think are AWESUMMMM .....and I suggest checking out their blogs...if you get the chance.

Thoughts Right Now

What it is

Life @ The White House

Adorably Distracted

Walking in Stilettos

Just An Everyday Bitch

Confessions of a Twenty Something

Sweat Shop

So the doxie dash as you all know is this Sat and we decided to make t-shirts to wear. Well this started out as a fun and exciting thing for me and my girls to get together and do....Boy was I wrong!!! So last week Monday we all went to hobby lobby picked out our shirts - got some cool stencils and some paint and headed home to get started. We got home turned up the music to hits of the 90's and began.

We painted the word team on two shirts and peeled off the stencils to admire our fine work only to see that it looked like crap. The paint had bled under the stencil . So the next day Lindy came over and back to hobby lobby we went -- and we went for iron on's -- which worked out SO much better -- we also got a cute paw print stamp -- so back home we went to work for hours -- this was a bit more complex and time consuming then I thought it would be. We got the lettering and paw print done on the girls shirts the first day and then yesterday Lindy cam over again and we got all the lettering done and I got the front of 2 1/2 shirts done. We decided to just paint a doxie on the front -- the most time consuming thing is the paint b/c we have to do like 4 layers to get it to look right!! Anyways I've now learned my lesson and if little bean butt makes it in again next year I think I'm just going to pay to have shirts made :0)

Here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure

our work station aka dining room

the front

the back
you can't tell in the picture but the girls are all glittery

love to stay and talk more but back to the sweat shop I go.....

Barney the Blue Betta

the video is not that good - sorry

So a few months ago Brad came home with Betta fish -- I was so excited because I had been wanting one for awhile. However I have a strong fear of killing him because I had bad luck w/ fish as a little Reese. So I've never had a Betta b/f and he is quit interesting -- he is very aware of what is going on and watches us walk around the house or watches the dogs chase their ball -- its quite amazing -- I always had goldfish growing up and they were not as cool as Barney is. In fact I think that everyone should get a Betta!!

He is very easy to take care of -- we just clean his bowl about once a week or so and feed him twice a day. And thats it!

The only thing is that Betta's can get depressed -- yep just found this out this last week. I changed Barney's water last Wed and ever since then he has been depressed. I thought I had killed him and he was just dying a long death. He would just lay at the bottom of his bowl in the corner or behind his flower and wouldn't eat. Then I got on the Internet and looked up Betta fish and found out that they can get so depressed that they will starve themselves to death. So one thing it suggested was to hold a mirror up to him so that he thinks there is another fish to fight and then after awhile of him flaring his fins slowly back the mirror away and out of sight so that he thinks he won and the other fish backed down.-- sounds crazy I know -- So we tried it and it has actually helped!! Barney is eating again and swimming around more -- not as much as he use to but he's coming around. Its so crazy my fish is depressed and was on the verge of suicide by starvation -- who knew he was so sensitive.

Rolled Into One

Where do I start... Okay, okay I have been majorly slacking in the whole blog department and I do apologize to my blogger friends -- however even though I have not been blogging I want you to know that I still keep up w/ all of you :0)

D-Day Destruction

I fell off the wagon and have been off for a week now -- I stopped taking my diet pills which then made me super sleepy all last week due to caffeine withdrawal and the rainy weather and pms did not help that situation at all either. I did not go to the gym one time - I ate crap all week and felt like poo!

Tomorrow I am starting over -- I'm going to the store buying salad and fruit and good healthy stuffs -- I'm going to the gym and not ... I repeat NOT sleeping in until noon!! Plus I find I do not sleep good if I don't work out -- that alone makes me want to work out b/c I love good sleep!!

Life and tough decisions

Last week was a bit stressful for me -- it turned out that our coordinator has accepted another position within the hospital and therefor her job is now open. I have been and still am undecided on the options before me -- I am currently in a great work schedule - I only work Thur/Fri/Sat from 11a-11p -- yes it is my whole day BUT its only 3 out of 7. Well this job would be Sun - Thur 7a-3p which isn't bad at all either and I have Fri/Sat off and it includes a pretty good pay raise. It's a hard decision b/c no matter if I get this position (which I have a very strong chance of getting) or not I am wanting to go back to school in the fall -- the extra $$ would help w/ that since I am not wanting to take out any more student loans and also I am in a great need of a new set of wheels BUT it also means going back to working 5 days a week which include Sunday (I HATE working Sundays) and it would come w/ more responsibility b/c it is a management position. So I applied for it and will probably have an interview and whatever happens - happens - if its meant to be then it will.

8 Things

Here's how to do this 8 THINGS thing:

Mention the person that tagged you. Snappy
Complete the lists of 8's.
Tag 8 of your wonderful bloggy friends.
Go tell them you tagged them!

8 THINGS I LOOK FORWARD TO

1. Charlie's Doxie Dash this next Saturday (the winner of the last couple yrs is in his heat)
2. Have 5 days off in a row next week -- good stuff
3. Going out w/ some friends for Cinco De Mayo on Tues
4. Summer!!! Laying out in the pool and having a tan!
5. Going to Colorado in July
6. Going back to school (see how long that last once I go back :))
7. Hanging out w/ Lindy tomorrow
8. Livin Life!

8 THINGS I DID YESTERDAY

1. Got out of bed
2. Got dressed
3. Went to work
4. Checked in my first patient to claim "I have the swine flu"
5. Left work
6. Got a snickers sonic blast -- so yummy
7. Watched tv
8. Went to bed

What an exciting life I lead -- you know your jealous :0)


8 THINGS I WISH I COULD DO

1. fly
2. be invisible
3. be done with school w/o actually having to go
4. be debt free
5. move to the ocean
6. win the lottery
7. have powers like Samantha from Bewitched
8. lose 20 lbs and still eat pasta everyday

8 SHOWS I WATCH

1. grays anatomy
2. private practice
3. brothers & sisters
4. desperate housewives
5. the hills
6. medium
7. ghost whisper
8. 48 hr mystery

8 PEOPLE I HAVE TAGGED

1. Callie
2. Clint
3. Carrie
4. walking in stilettos
5. life @ the white house
6. adorably distracted

-- I only got 6 -- I suck!

One Last Thing

Im in the process of finding a blog layout that I love and feels right and I can't so you'll probably see mine changing alot until I feel comfortable w/ the look -- and if anyone has any free layout sites you find helpful let me know!!